Here are some helpful hints for coping with your child's death during the holidays:
Be Kind to Yourself
- Set realistic goals for the holidays. Keep expectations simple.
- Focus on what you want to do. Remember that the holidays are more than one day, so pace yourself. Spread enjoyable activities throughout the entire season.
- Get plenty of rest, nourishment and affection. Grief can be physically and emotionally exhausting, so respect what your body is telling you.
- Try to live in the present, but look forward to the future.
- Ask for help planning, shopping and entertaining when you need it.
Express Your Feelings
- Expect to feel emotional pain. When those feelings come, express them. Look for triggers that you are not aware of that may cause your emotional outbursts.
- Remember not everyone responds to the holidays in the same. Talk to others as you make your holiday plans, and respect their needs and choices, just as they respect yours.
- Don't follow other people's holiday plans if they don't feel right to you.
Be With Those Who Comfort You
- Share your pain and struggles with those you love.
- Identify people with whom you can be honest.
- If you or a family member experiences uncontrollable pain, seek professional help.
Remember Your Loved One
- Include your child's name in conversation and share your memories.
- Create a new family tradition in honor of your child.
- Read a poem or prayer in your child's honor.
- Visit the gravesite with fresh flowers.
- Create a memory quilt.
- Put together photo albums.
- Place fresh flowers in a stocking.
- Decorate with items that remind you of your child.
